It's debate night, and that can only mean one thing*: it's time for unsubstantiated claims.
*Okay, two things. It also means millions around the nation will tune into their favorite network and exclaim, "What's goin' on? It's time for 'So You Think You Can Eat Your Weight in Tacos.'"
That's right, candidates could say pretty much anything without having to worry about the burden of having to provide evidence of such claims. It's the reason news stations and websites now make a point of citing the errors in hours of debate dissection. During the live debate, nearly anything can be claimed as fact as long as someone is willing to argue for it. They could say anything and, odds are, someone out there would believe it.
Such an idea really got me thinking. What type of claims (sans any sense of supporting evidence whatsoever) could candidates make during this town hall meeting? How about:
- The real downfall of the economy is the demise of the sports trading card industry.
- Any Americans named Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac have been deported.
- P.D. Eastman's "Go Dog, Go!" contains a coded map leading to treasure meant to bail out the U.S. in times of economic disparity.
- Abraham Lincoln used to hide snacks in his hat.
- The three blind mice were actually anorexic, glaucoma-suffering squirrels.
- A combination of Kroger brand Cheese Puffs and Red Bull is the future of clean energy.
- Alaska was not the largest state in the union until it hooked up with BALCO.
- Global warming can actually be stopped by people setting their air conditioners to lower temperatures.
- Terrorists turn against America because they can't find Nintendo Wii systems anywhere.
- Pork barrels helped make last year's Independence Day barbecue the tastiest ever.
- Back to the Future is based on a true story.
- For a brief period, the two major political parties considered changing their names to the Nation of Domination and the nWo.
- The opposing candidate would not have run if Brett Favre had thrown his hat (helmet) in the race.
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Unfortunately, 104 minutes later, none of my suggested unsubstantiated claims were brought up in tonight's debate. Sure, there was talk of the economy, foreign policy, and more, but how can you have a debate without any movie, video game, sports, or professional wrestling references? It's mind-boggling.
At least we have one more debate before the election.
*Okay, two things. It also means millions around the nation will tune into their favorite network and exclaim, "What's goin' on? It's time for 'So You Think You Can Eat Your Weight in Tacos.'"
That's right, candidates could say pretty much anything without having to worry about the burden of having to provide evidence of such claims. It's the reason news stations and websites now make a point of citing the errors in hours of debate dissection. During the live debate, nearly anything can be claimed as fact as long as someone is willing to argue for it. They could say anything and, odds are, someone out there would believe it.
Such an idea really got me thinking. What type of claims (sans any sense of supporting evidence whatsoever) could candidates make during this town hall meeting? How about:
- The real downfall of the economy is the demise of the sports trading card industry.
- Any Americans named Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac have been deported.
- P.D. Eastman's "Go Dog, Go!" contains a coded map leading to treasure meant to bail out the U.S. in times of economic disparity.
- Abraham Lincoln used to hide snacks in his hat.
- The three blind mice were actually anorexic, glaucoma-suffering squirrels.
- A combination of Kroger brand Cheese Puffs and Red Bull is the future of clean energy.
- Alaska was not the largest state in the union until it hooked up with BALCO.
- Global warming can actually be stopped by people setting their air conditioners to lower temperatures.
- Terrorists turn against America because they can't find Nintendo Wii systems anywhere.
- Pork barrels helped make last year's Independence Day barbecue the tastiest ever.
- Back to the Future is based on a true story.
- For a brief period, the two major political parties considered changing their names to the Nation of Domination and the nWo.
- The opposing candidate would not have run if Brett Favre had thrown his hat (helmet) in the race.
--------------
Unfortunately, 104 minutes later, none of my suggested unsubstantiated claims were brought up in tonight's debate. Sure, there was talk of the economy, foreign policy, and more, but how can you have a debate without any movie, video game, sports, or professional wrestling references? It's mind-boggling.
At least we have one more debate before the election.
2 comments:
Your collection of trivia plus an equally vivid imagination makes for some very cleaver ideas. Have to admit I don't get all of them but, hey, that's my age showing.
Especially love the 3 blind mice.
As to debates and other electorial claims, a friend brought up a Mark Twain quote the other day that seems especially relevant: a lie can be a long way around the world while the truth is still putting on its shoes.
"Have to admit I don't get all of them..."
...If I only had a nickel...
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