Attention readers:
The governing board of The Writings has decided that this writing will contain no horrible attempts at humor. We're devoting this column to covering important issues with a fair and balanced view. It will be journalism at it's finest.
I'd say "April Fools" right here, but I'm pretty confident that my readers are too sharp to believe the previous paragraph... That, or they quit reading* because a blog that has spent time detailing conversations overheard at Burger King doesn't exactly scream "journalism at it's finest." At least I'm pretty confident I never misquoted those folks.
*Wait, if my readers already quit reading that who is reading this? I think that thought just popped a blood vessel in my head. It's kind of a question with the "sound of one hand clapping" vibe to it.
Anyway, with the employment that actually pays my bills consuming far too much time lately, I've had little time to observe much else. Because I'd rather ride a tricycle in a game of chicken than write about my job, we're kicking it old school (I don't really know what that's supposed to mean here, it's just a fun phrase to use. Try it. I'll wait... ) and passing along some quick observations.
- A commercial refers to Fast and Furious as the best in the relatively recent series of movies that team up the words "fast" and "furious" in their titles. It seems to me that this is kind of like calling a half-eaten bearclaw that has soaked up an unidentifiable liquid the most delectable pastry in a bakery dumpster.
- I recently joined blip.fm, a website that allows you to customize a sort of online radio station, and serve as your own disc jockey (headphones, glowsticks, and annoying catchphrases not included). Other members can listen to the songs you choose to play and give you "props" (please note: these aren't props in the Carrot Top sense). I received props from three different listeners for playing Paul Simon's Call Me Al... and it was strangely satisfying.
- Another note on blip... To notify me that I'm logged in, the website says, "You are dereklarson" up in the right hand corner. I'm just glad to know that, should I ever get amnesia while on my laptop, blip.fm will be there to help me remember my name (even if I do end up thinking dereklarson is all one name). Blip - your memory is safe with them.
- In other online, social networking news, of sorts, an NBA player recently was reprimanded for "tweeting" (updating his status on Twitter, for those unfamiliar with online terminology seemingly inspired by ornithology) during halftime of a game he was participating in. Yes, folks, professional athletes tweet during their games... Next up, surgeons. Soon you'll see a post saying "Just sewed up appendectomy patient, but now idk where scalpel is. :( " *
*Texting language used to demonstrate absurdity of situation only. Please do not try at home.
- We're just days away from Major League Baseball's Opening Day 2009, and I'm beginning to lie awake pondering important questions like "When he's in the lineup, should Mark Teahen bat second in the order?" and "Can Sidney Ponson actually be a worthwhile starter?" On top of that, I participated in a fantasy baseball draft last night and landed the player I consider to be the best in the game - Albert Pujols. All this really means is that in a few weeks you will probably get to be part of a poll asking if I should seek help for a baseball addiction. Your input is appreciated.
The governing board of The Writings has decided that this writing will contain no horrible attempts at humor. We're devoting this column to covering important issues with a fair and balanced view. It will be journalism at it's finest.
I'd say "April Fools" right here, but I'm pretty confident that my readers are too sharp to believe the previous paragraph... That, or they quit reading* because a blog that has spent time detailing conversations overheard at Burger King doesn't exactly scream "journalism at it's finest." At least I'm pretty confident I never misquoted those folks.
*Wait, if my readers already quit reading that who is reading this? I think that thought just popped a blood vessel in my head. It's kind of a question with the "sound of one hand clapping" vibe to it.
Anyway, with the employment that actually pays my bills consuming far too much time lately, I've had little time to observe much else. Because I'd rather ride a tricycle in a game of chicken than write about my job, we're kicking it old school (I don't really know what that's supposed to mean here, it's just a fun phrase to use. Try it. I'll wait... ) and passing along some quick observations.
- A commercial refers to Fast and Furious as the best in the relatively recent series of movies that team up the words "fast" and "furious" in their titles. It seems to me that this is kind of like calling a half-eaten bearclaw that has soaked up an unidentifiable liquid the most delectable pastry in a bakery dumpster.
- I recently joined blip.fm, a website that allows you to customize a sort of online radio station, and serve as your own disc jockey (headphones, glowsticks, and annoying catchphrases not included). Other members can listen to the songs you choose to play and give you "props" (please note: these aren't props in the Carrot Top sense). I received props from three different listeners for playing Paul Simon's Call Me Al... and it was strangely satisfying.
- Another note on blip... To notify me that I'm logged in, the website says, "You are dereklarson" up in the right hand corner. I'm just glad to know that, should I ever get amnesia while on my laptop, blip.fm will be there to help me remember my name (even if I do end up thinking dereklarson is all one name). Blip - your memory is safe with them.
- In other online, social networking news, of sorts, an NBA player recently was reprimanded for "tweeting" (updating his status on Twitter, for those unfamiliar with online terminology seemingly inspired by ornithology) during halftime of a game he was participating in. Yes, folks, professional athletes tweet during their games... Next up, surgeons. Soon you'll see a post saying "Just sewed up appendectomy patient, but now idk where scalpel is. :( " *
*Texting language used to demonstrate absurdity of situation only. Please do not try at home.
- We're just days away from Major League Baseball's Opening Day 2009, and I'm beginning to lie awake pondering important questions like "When he's in the lineup, should Mark Teahen bat second in the order?" and "Can Sidney Ponson actually be a worthwhile starter?" On top of that, I participated in a fantasy baseball draft last night and landed the player I consider to be the best in the game - Albert Pujols. All this really means is that in a few weeks you will probably get to be part of a poll asking if I should seek help for a baseball addiction. Your input is appreciated.
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