Recent scuttlebutt has surrounded the fact the NBC's coverage of the 2010 Winter Olympics has about as impressive as a broken gravy boat.
While the analogy doesn't really make any sense*, it doesn't really matter, as most readers probably closed their browsers once they saw that I had used the word "scuttlebutt." For those that are still reading, thanks. Now, let's get to the meat
and potatoes*.
*Or whatever the Vancouverian equivalent is... Something measured metrically, no doubt.
I have read that the Olympic coverage thus far - due to poor commentary, few live events, and a lack of abominable snowmen -
has been subpar. I haven't paid attention, partly because I find the games about as exciting as watching snow melt, and partly because - as long-time readers know - ice is my sworn enemy. Nevertheless, because the games are keeping quality programming like Parks and Rec and The Office off the air tonight, I figured I would check in on the competition that best indicates what nation will rule the world once the next Ice Age* hits.
*That's the actual geological period, not the movies that get progressively worse with each sequel.
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Lindesy Vonn, you've probably heard of her. She's the blonde, swimsuit-modeling, American skier who is participating in these games despite the fact that one leg is attached by just two tendons. It's a story of true courage... Wait... What? She only is suffering from a sore shin? Why has she been forced down America's throat like a non-Flintstone vitamin?
-----
One NBC commentator just referred to a skier that crashed yesterday but is returning to ski again today as "a true champion." this proves I know nothing about the Winter Olympics. I had no idea that Horrific Crashing was an event you could medal in.
-----
More annoying: Shaun White or Carrot Top?
And why are they showing a Shaun White interview instead of an actual Olympic event?
-----
How long before we see a horrific injury in the skiing slalom courtesy some joker replacing once of the slalom poles with an iron tetherball pole? It has to happen, right?
-----
45 minutes into the evenings Olympic coverage, I think I've seen as many commercials as were shown in the last three Super Bowls combined. Guess we know how NBC is paying off the Conan O'Brien settlement.
-----
It's well documented (by me, as well as at least one nurse practitioner) that I have the balance of an inebriated emu. As a result, I have to wonder how far down this slalom hill I could make it on a pair of skis.
-----
The answer: However far my initial fall would take me.
-----
Vonn takes a spill in the slalom thanks to what a broadcaster calls "a classic hooked tip." At least it wasn't one of those "atypical hooked tips."
It's very clear that I have no clue what I'm referring to. It's also very clear that Syracuse is playing Georgetown and is only ahead by two with three minutes left.
So long, Olympics.
While the analogy doesn't really make any sense*, it doesn't really matter, as most readers probably closed their browsers once they saw that I had used the word "scuttlebutt." For those that are still reading, thanks. Now, let's get to the meat
and potatoes*.
*Or whatever the Vancouverian equivalent is... Something measured metrically, no doubt.
I have read that the Olympic coverage thus far - due to poor commentary, few live events, and a lack of abominable snowmen -
has been subpar. I haven't paid attention, partly because I find the games about as exciting as watching snow melt, and partly because - as long-time readers know - ice is my sworn enemy. Nevertheless, because the games are keeping quality programming like Parks and Rec and The Office off the air tonight, I figured I would check in on the competition that best indicates what nation will rule the world once the next Ice Age* hits.
*That's the actual geological period, not the movies that get progressively worse with each sequel.
-----
Lindesy Vonn, you've probably heard of her. She's the blonde, swimsuit-modeling, American skier who is participating in these games despite the fact that one leg is attached by just two tendons. It's a story of true courage... Wait... What? She only is suffering from a sore shin? Why has she been forced down America's throat like a non-Flintstone vitamin?
-----
One NBC commentator just referred to a skier that crashed yesterday but is returning to ski again today as "a true champion." this proves I know nothing about the Winter Olympics. I had no idea that Horrific Crashing was an event you could medal in.
-----
More annoying: Shaun White or Carrot Top?
And why are they showing a Shaun White interview instead of an actual Olympic event?
-----
How long before we see a horrific injury in the skiing slalom courtesy some joker replacing once of the slalom poles with an iron tetherball pole? It has to happen, right?
-----
45 minutes into the evenings Olympic coverage, I think I've seen as many commercials as were shown in the last three Super Bowls combined. Guess we know how NBC is paying off the Conan O'Brien settlement.
-----
It's well documented (by me, as well as at least one nurse practitioner) that I have the balance of an inebriated emu. As a result, I have to wonder how far down this slalom hill I could make it on a pair of skis.
-----
The answer: However far my initial fall would take me.
-----
Vonn takes a spill in the slalom thanks to what a broadcaster calls "a classic hooked tip." At least it wasn't one of those "atypical hooked tips."
It's very clear that I have no clue what I'm referring to. It's also very clear that Syracuse is playing Georgetown and is only ahead by two with three minutes left.
So long, Olympics.
1 comment:
Yes, Runway featured children modeling tonight along with the willowy (translation: skinny) models. More original than falling down in the snow, me thinks!
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