Which came first, the tortoise or the egg? If a tree falls and crushes a chipmunk in the forest, does it make a sound? What is the sound of a footless person tap-dancing? Life is full of intriguing questions; the type that one could ponder for hours on end. Luckily for me, I seemed to have such time on my hands today, thanks to the insanity that comes with the holiday shopping season. (Note to self: Do your 2011 Christmas shopping in February.) I had the opportunity to be a part of a checkout line 25 people deep at a rather large consumer electronics store today, providing ample time to ponder the questions above, plus many more. Here's a sampling of today's topics of pondering.
Who or what is the owner of a camouflage Snuggie attempting to hide from... aside from good taste and common sense?
What level of a lush does one have to be to trust their perception of sobriety to a $14.99 breathalyzer keychain?
Why does the girl in front of me think that continually asking her boyfriend "What is taking so long?" will make the checkout line move more quickly?
If one pays for "Black Tie Protection" on their electronics, are they actually supporting the mob?
Does anyone need a new hobby more than the person who buys full seasons of "Reba" on DVD?
What is a "Plannerzine" and why does it feature that wolfy guy from Twilight on the cover?
Does your kid really need 13 different Nintendo DS games for Christmas?
Are the small bags of fruit snacks on sale for an overpriced $2 apiece in the impulse-buy area placed there as a simple test of sanity?
Finally - and most importantly - why in land of LED screens are there only two registers open on a Saturday during the holiday shopping season?
Who or what is the owner of a camouflage Snuggie attempting to hide from... aside from good taste and common sense?
What level of a lush does one have to be to trust their perception of sobriety to a $14.99 breathalyzer keychain?
Why does the girl in front of me think that continually asking her boyfriend "What is taking so long?" will make the checkout line move more quickly?
If one pays for "Black Tie Protection" on their electronics, are they actually supporting the mob?
Does anyone need a new hobby more than the person who buys full seasons of "Reba" on DVD?
What is a "Plannerzine" and why does it feature that wolfy guy from Twilight on the cover?
Does your kid really need 13 different Nintendo DS games for Christmas?
Are the small bags of fruit snacks on sale for an overpriced $2 apiece in the impulse-buy area placed there as a simple test of sanity?
Finally - and most importantly - why in land of LED screens are there only two registers open on a Saturday during the holiday shopping season?
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