At this point in time, my couch is making comments about how lazy I am, but I can't quit now. It's nearly Wildcat game-time.
9:09 p.m.
Before we get to K-State-UCLA coverage, we're treated to the end of the Cincinnati-Oregon State contest. Out of sheer boredom, I decided to look at Cincy's athletic website. It makes me wonder if they have a difficult time believing that they actually have a successful football program.
Why do I feel this way? The Bearcats list their spring game as a victory on their schedule page.
9:24 p.m.
Apparently things are more relaxed on the west coast. I was pretty certain kickoff was set for 9:15 p.m. Weird.
9:27 p.m.
UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel basically confirms that we'll see two different UCLA quarterbacks in the game tonight. With that, the over/under for quarterbacks to appear in this game is set at 4.5. What's your bet?
9:30 p.m.
Wildcat quarterback Carson Coffman carries the ball on two consecutive plays. The next play, running back Daniel Thomas carries. One of the plays was not like the others.
9:33 p.m.
An announcer insists on calling K-State receiver Attrail Snipes "AN-trail," despite the fact that his first name does not contain the letter necessary to create the "nuh" sound in the English language. Oh well. Names can be DIN-ficult.
9:35 p.m.
After putting together a rather productive drive, it all goes awry when Coffman throws an interception after being flushed from the pocket. Opening-drive points are overrated, anyway.
9:45 p.m.
The Bruins take a 7-0 lead after pushing the ball down the field in fairly impressive fashion. D'oh.
9:52 p.m.
Right after I send a text message complaining about too many carries by Coffman, the Cats get a big gain on a shovel pass that was perfectly set up by the QB run threat, and then get another good gain on a QB keeper. There are many reasons I don't coach football; this supports one of them.
9:53 p.m.
After missing a touchdown by a length of receiver Brandon Banks' toes, kicker Josh Cherry knocks in a field goal to put the Wildcats on the board. Cherry missed three kicks a week ago, so such a sight is akin to seeing a Gatorade factory after being lost in the Sahara.
9:59 p.m.
UCLA has a touchdown called back due to having an ineligible receiver downfield. Nonetheless, I'm beginning to have second thoughts about my prediction.
10:05 p.m.
UCLA hits a field goal, and it's revealed that some stats for this game are sponsored by eharmony.com. K-State is thin enough on the defensive line that I'm tempted to check eharmony for some backups. Does it work as a recruiting service?
10:14 p.m.
UCLA converts on 3rd-and-14.
10:15 p.m.
I turn on the curse-word filter in my head.
10:16 p.m.
UCLA decides to try to pick on the most proven player on the K-State defense, cornerback Josh Moore. Moore expresses his appreciation by pulling down an interception. I'm not sure what the Bruins were trying to accomplish there, but I hope they try it a few more times.
10:26 p.m.
K-State is penalized after a UCLA player shoves a Wildcat into the Bruin punt returner. Two plays later, the Bruins are down to the Wildcat 35-yard-line. Luckly, the curse-filter is working effectively.
10:31 p.m.
Wildcats limit Bruins to a field goal. Bruins lead 13-3. K-State is right back in this game if they can score a touchdown... Unfortunately, at times that seems like a pretty big "if."
10:37 p.m.
Daniel Thomas completes a pass out of the Wildcat formation... And tonight's winner of the "get this guy the ball more" award is... Daniel Thomas!
10:39 p.m.
Thomas gets the ball... Unfortunately, he has to scoop it off the turf after a failed pitch on the option. What starts with 'p' and rhymes with bunt?
10:42 p.m.
UCLA leads 13-3 at the half. The announcer deems it an "effective" half for both squads. I disagree.
11:06 p.m.
We're back, and the announcers are talking about the Rose Bowl as if it is the Holy Land. I'm 98-percent sure that's not true.
11:16 p.m.
The Wildcat offense looks effective thus far on this drive. The reason? Thomas has taken several snaps in the Wildcat and has befulddled the Bruin defense. No. 8 needs to be involved in nearly every play at this point.
11:22 p.m.
"A lot of Wildcat fans expected Thomas to be a Michael Beasley or Ell Roberson-type."
Honestly, I didn't expect Daniel Thomas to be anything like Michael Beasley. I don't recall him doing much on the gridiron.
11:24 p.m.
Thomas finds paydirt. Wildcat fans find hope. Coach Snyder finds an offensive option.
11:25 p.m.
The special teams unit finds a new way to botch an extra point when the holder somehow cannot find the ground to set the ball on. I've lost track of a lot of things in my life, but the ground has never been one of them.
11:30 p.m.
UCLA punts after finding nothing on offense. Can the Cats score on back-to-back possessions?
11:33 p.m.
No. But, the Bruins' next drive starts at their own 4 after a nifty punt by Ryan Doerr.
11:37 p.m.
UCLA punts from its own end zone and KSU's next drive will start at the Bruin 41. Can the Cats score on alternating possessions?
11:40 p.m.
A Bruin defender leads with his head instead of thinking with it, prompting a flag and extending the Wildcats' drive. Hooray for mindless antics.
11:43 p.m.
The field goal unit is back. Accuracy is not. K-State misses an opportunity to cut the UCLA lead to one. I think they might be approaching the record for missed kicks set by a Charles Brown years ago.
11:46 p.m.
UCLA receiver Nelson Rosario a one-handed grab that any receiver would envy. Speaking from experience, it's also a catch that brings fans of the opposing team to shout obscenities.
11:54 p.m.
The UCLA kicker nailes a field goal. He's on the Groza Award (best kicker) watch list. It seems that a kicker is something one takes for granted until they don't have one.
11:58 p.m.
That drive was about as productive as a visit from a Jehovah's Witness.
12:03 a.m.
We're past midnight, and UCLA drive is saved by a horse-collar penalty. The Bruins capitalize with a long passing touchdown... I never have been a fan of equestrian fashion.
12:14 a.m.
A pass that basically amounted to K-State's last chance to stay in this game just fluttered to the ground like wounded moth. Thirteen hours after it began, Nothing But Football day ends with nothing but aggravation. This game could have been something very different, but the production from certain areas on this team is far less than it should be.
12:18 a.m.
Unbelievably, K-State attempts to defy my eulogy by forcing a fumble and getting the ball back. Miracle time?
12:20 a.m.
If allowing two sacks, a near-interception, and an actual interception in a span of four plays counts as a miracle, then yes; miracles can happen. Who has a fork? This one is done. Bruins 23, Wildcats 9.
12:22 a.m.
I never have liked football, anyway.
9:09 p.m.
Before we get to K-State-UCLA coverage, we're treated to the end of the Cincinnati-Oregon State contest. Out of sheer boredom, I decided to look at Cincy's athletic website. It makes me wonder if they have a difficult time believing that they actually have a successful football program.
Why do I feel this way? The Bearcats list their spring game as a victory on their schedule page.
9:24 p.m.
Apparently things are more relaxed on the west coast. I was pretty certain kickoff was set for 9:15 p.m. Weird.
9:27 p.m.
UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel basically confirms that we'll see two different UCLA quarterbacks in the game tonight. With that, the over/under for quarterbacks to appear in this game is set at 4.5. What's your bet?
9:30 p.m.
Wildcat quarterback Carson Coffman carries the ball on two consecutive plays. The next play, running back Daniel Thomas carries. One of the plays was not like the others.
9:33 p.m.
An announcer insists on calling K-State receiver Attrail Snipes "AN-trail," despite the fact that his first name does not contain the letter necessary to create the "nuh" sound in the English language. Oh well. Names can be DIN-ficult.
9:35 p.m.
After putting together a rather productive drive, it all goes awry when Coffman throws an interception after being flushed from the pocket. Opening-drive points are overrated, anyway.
9:45 p.m.
The Bruins take a 7-0 lead after pushing the ball down the field in fairly impressive fashion. D'oh.
9:52 p.m.
Right after I send a text message complaining about too many carries by Coffman, the Cats get a big gain on a shovel pass that was perfectly set up by the QB run threat, and then get another good gain on a QB keeper. There are many reasons I don't coach football; this supports one of them.
9:53 p.m.
After missing a touchdown by a length of receiver Brandon Banks' toes, kicker Josh Cherry knocks in a field goal to put the Wildcats on the board. Cherry missed three kicks a week ago, so such a sight is akin to seeing a Gatorade factory after being lost in the Sahara.
9:59 p.m.
UCLA has a touchdown called back due to having an ineligible receiver downfield. Nonetheless, I'm beginning to have second thoughts about my prediction.
10:05 p.m.
UCLA hits a field goal, and it's revealed that some stats for this game are sponsored by eharmony.com. K-State is thin enough on the defensive line that I'm tempted to check eharmony for some backups. Does it work as a recruiting service?
10:14 p.m.
UCLA converts on 3rd-and-14.
10:15 p.m.
I turn on the curse-word filter in my head.
10:16 p.m.
UCLA decides to try to pick on the most proven player on the K-State defense, cornerback Josh Moore. Moore expresses his appreciation by pulling down an interception. I'm not sure what the Bruins were trying to accomplish there, but I hope they try it a few more times.
10:26 p.m.
K-State is penalized after a UCLA player shoves a Wildcat into the Bruin punt returner. Two plays later, the Bruins are down to the Wildcat 35-yard-line. Luckly, the curse-filter is working effectively.
10:31 p.m.
Wildcats limit Bruins to a field goal. Bruins lead 13-3. K-State is right back in this game if they can score a touchdown... Unfortunately, at times that seems like a pretty big "if."
10:37 p.m.
Daniel Thomas completes a pass out of the Wildcat formation... And tonight's winner of the "get this guy the ball more" award is... Daniel Thomas!
10:39 p.m.
Thomas gets the ball... Unfortunately, he has to scoop it off the turf after a failed pitch on the option. What starts with 'p' and rhymes with bunt?
10:42 p.m.
UCLA leads 13-3 at the half. The announcer deems it an "effective" half for both squads. I disagree.
11:06 p.m.
We're back, and the announcers are talking about the Rose Bowl as if it is the Holy Land. I'm 98-percent sure that's not true.
11:16 p.m.
The Wildcat offense looks effective thus far on this drive. The reason? Thomas has taken several snaps in the Wildcat and has befulddled the Bruin defense. No. 8 needs to be involved in nearly every play at this point.
11:22 p.m.
"A lot of Wildcat fans expected Thomas to be a Michael Beasley or Ell Roberson-type."
Honestly, I didn't expect Daniel Thomas to be anything like Michael Beasley. I don't recall him doing much on the gridiron.
11:24 p.m.
Thomas finds paydirt. Wildcat fans find hope. Coach Snyder finds an offensive option.
11:25 p.m.
The special teams unit finds a new way to botch an extra point when the holder somehow cannot find the ground to set the ball on. I've lost track of a lot of things in my life, but the ground has never been one of them.
11:30 p.m.
UCLA punts after finding nothing on offense. Can the Cats score on back-to-back possessions?
11:33 p.m.
No. But, the Bruins' next drive starts at their own 4 after a nifty punt by Ryan Doerr.
11:37 p.m.
UCLA punts from its own end zone and KSU's next drive will start at the Bruin 41. Can the Cats score on alternating possessions?
11:40 p.m.
A Bruin defender leads with his head instead of thinking with it, prompting a flag and extending the Wildcats' drive. Hooray for mindless antics.
11:43 p.m.
The field goal unit is back. Accuracy is not. K-State misses an opportunity to cut the UCLA lead to one. I think they might be approaching the record for missed kicks set by a Charles Brown years ago.
11:46 p.m.
UCLA receiver Nelson Rosario a one-handed grab that any receiver would envy. Speaking from experience, it's also a catch that brings fans of the opposing team to shout obscenities.
11:54 p.m.
The UCLA kicker nailes a field goal. He's on the Groza Award (best kicker) watch list. It seems that a kicker is something one takes for granted until they don't have one.
11:58 p.m.
That drive was about as productive as a visit from a Jehovah's Witness.
12:03 a.m.
We're past midnight, and UCLA drive is saved by a horse-collar penalty. The Bruins capitalize with a long passing touchdown... I never have been a fan of equestrian fashion.
12:14 a.m.
A pass that basically amounted to K-State's last chance to stay in this game just fluttered to the ground like wounded moth. Thirteen hours after it began, Nothing But Football day ends with nothing but aggravation. This game could have been something very different, but the production from certain areas on this team is far less than it should be.
12:18 a.m.
Unbelievably, K-State attempts to defy my eulogy by forcing a fumble and getting the ball back. Miracle time?
12:20 a.m.
If allowing two sacks, a near-interception, and an actual interception in a span of four plays counts as a miracle, then yes; miracles can happen. Who has a fork? This one is done. Bruins 23, Wildcats 9.
12:22 a.m.
I never have liked football, anyway.
No comments:
Post a Comment